Super Moon Blood Moon Lunar Eclipse 9/27/15 photo by Kevin Tomasello |
I've been feeling the gravitational pull of my writing. It's been a struggle lately, juggling an increasingly stressful full time job with the utter need to write. Most of my days and nights are spent piecemeal: tiny morsels of time spent on projects that scream for intense, in-depth immersion. I find myself desperate for any tidbits of distracting creativity: a line of a poem, a musical phrase, quiet solitude for contemplation and gazing at my toenails, searching for the right words to lay down on the page. Any writing accomplished is like blood-letting: laborious, scrutinized, depressing, a strangled glut of words choked from a moldy gourd. Recently, a pleasant, although obviously non-writer gentleman informed me that he didn't see the problem with writing a book. "You just come up with an outline and write it out, don't you?" I nodded, teeth clenched, head wobbling like a pumpkin on a corn stalk. If it were that easy, I suppose I would have a thousand books by now. Perhaps, a book should appear easily written, like a doctor who breezes in for a five minute visit with his or her patient, quickly diagnosing and treating a medical problem. No one sees the eight or more years of schooling and the four or more years of residency: the extended sleepless marathons of common colds and domestic abuse cases; the wretched consequences of mistakes; the soul-battering humiliation and genuine fear of not being an immediate expert. Everyone thinks they know what it is because they read it on the internet or their second cousin's nephew's girlfriend is a nurse and she said ...
Not to compare writng to medicine, but why not? It requires the skill of a surgeon, the language application of a linguist, the most passionate open-heart imaginable, and the full-body armor of a knight: not to mention the total exposure of your very soul to the whole world. To all my writer friends out there: may the blood of passion eclipse your doubts and reap your best harvest as you grow and grow and GROW.